Sharing: The Death of My Beloved Father (2)



After the funeral of my father, I started to work on the death certificate and other paperworks should be done with the notary public.
For months, I asked when God will wipe away my tears and will I wipe away other’s tears as I couldn’t wipe away my own tears. God did it. During the wake and funeral, I didn’t cry as heavy as when I left home last Feb 2010 for Hong Kong.
God gave me the grace to leave home peacefully on Aug 2, 2010 after signing the paperworks at the notary public. I stayed at my grandparents’ house in Sidoarjo and left my luggage in brother’s car as he would pick me up in the next morning to go to airport. He didn’t show up untill I arrived airport around 7.30 a.m. with my uncle and his friend. He overslept. I asked the staff of Garuda Indonesia to change my flight. I could re-book for Aug 8, 2010 with additional HKD 180.00.
As I had extra days, I had lunch with Sandra, Vonny, Hongko, and several friends in ICAC Surabaya; sat down in a cafe with Mrs. Anastasia, Achun and his wife; went around Tunjungan Plaza with my auntie; visited Fr. Sarto Mitakda, SVD, Fr. Sony Keraf, SVD; attended prayer meeting of Yohanes Salib 2 of Holy Trinity Carmel, priestly ordination for 8 deacon at Cathedral Surabaya, “tirakatan malem jumat legi” (=midnight rosary and mass on sweet Thursday night according to Javanese calendar) at Grotto in Puhsarang-Kediri http://id.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gereja_Puhsarang. I also went home again and was picked up by my friend in School of Personal Evangelization Mrs. Anastasia and his husband to go to Surabaya on Aug 7, 2010. I am so grateful for this blessing in disguise.
My uncles accompanied me to the airport on Aug 8, 2010. My uncle Yung Siu picked me up at Hong Kong airport as I brought Indonesian goodies for him. My sisters gave a warm welcome as I was going around the house. There were pink flowers and cards in my table.
I prepared a pink booklet for the memorial mass on Aug 21, 2010 in our Boundary Street Chapel. Our contemplative community and Sr. Claudette, MM gave below quotation so I copied it on the booklet:
The great and sad mistake of many people-among them, even pious persons- is to imagine that those whom death has taken, leave us. They do not leave us. They remain! Where are they? In darkness? Oh, no! It is we who are in darkness. We do not see them, but they see us. Their eyes, radiant with glory, are fixed upon our eyes full of tears. Oh, infinite consolation! Though invisible to us, our dead is not absent.
I have often reflected upon the surest comfort for those who mourn. It is this: a firm faith in the real and continual presence of our loved ones; it is the clear and penetrating conviction that death has not destroyed them, nor carried them away. They are not even absent, but living near us, transfigured: having lost, in their glorious change, no delicacy of their souls, no tenderness of their hearts, nor especial preference in their affection. On the contrary, they have, in depth and in fervor of devotion, grown larger a hundredfold. Death is, for the good, a translation into light, into power, into love. Those who on earth were only ordinary Christians become perfect…those who were good become sublime. (Karl Rahner, SJ)
My sisters in China region, uncle, cousin, cousin in-law and grand uncle attended the mass. My classmate at Catholic Theological Union and Mandarin teacher in Chicago, Fr. John, SVD presided the mass. Sr. Agnes prepared the pink and white flowers in front of the altar and Sr. Annie gave pink lotus candle. Sr. Maureen welcomed the guests, Sr. Arlene played the guitar for the entrance song “We Remember." The first reading from 1 Thessalonians 4: 13-18, the responsorial psalm from Psalm 23, and the Gospel from John 14: 1-3, 27. I played an Indonesian song “Smua Baik” (=All is well) through the laptop after the communion and video of the collection of the pictures during the wake and funeral of my father after the blessing. As my voice started to change so I shorten my thank you speech.
My uncle brought “nasi kuning” (=Indonesian yellow rice with meat, potato, fermented soya bean, cucumber, vegetable coconut soup, crackers), “risoles” and “kroket” (=potato cake), Sr. Michelle made a rice snack and I cooked shrimp fried rice.
As I wrote in the booklet: Thank you very much for your presence here today, for all your efforts to console my family and I, for your help to arrange this memorial mass and especially for your prayers. Please continue to pray for my family and I, as we continue our life without the presence of our beloved father physically.

Kowloon Tong-Hong Kong, Aug 25, 2010


Sr. Anastasia B. Lindawati, M.M.
Let’s do simple things with simple love to make God’s love visible